Thursday, August 23, 2012

Diet update

Remember how I told you the momma came home from being away from me for a WHOLE WEEK and told me I was fat?  Ok, maybe she said chunky, but whatever.  Anyway, she thinks she has it all figured out.
You, lady, are crazy callin' me chunky.

Now, do you also remember  a few weeks ago I made a confession to you about my love for Puddles Milkybones?  Well, in case you forgot, I absolutely go crazy for Milkybones.  I'm talkin' back flips!  So, the momma got me some really huge milkybones and keeps them somewhere where I can't reach.
To prevent her walking in on this.... again.

Although I can't reach them... do you know who can?  My dad!  He can reach them and he gives me one whole huge milkybone every time I deserve a treat!  Which is like 87 times a day. Whereas the momma gives me like 1/87th of that treat.  Seriously, she crunches and smushes it up so that me and the Brutus have to share 1 treat all day long.  Here's my example:
Cruel and unusual punishment.

You see the treat on top?  That's my super large milkybone that dad gives me.  See the treat on the bottom?  That's the size that the momma uses, and she breaks it in half -or sometimes THREES or even worse, FIFTHS!  And, I only get milkybones from the momma when I refuse to come inside because it's the only way she can get me in sometimes when I'm stubborn and I want a milkybone.  Otherwise, I get carrots or sweet taters or healthier snacks -all which are fine, but NOT milkybones!  So, she thinks that I got chunky by eating 87 large milkybones a day... I think she needs to get her eyes checked because I'm still 100% handsome, milkybones and all!
Handsome + Milkeybone = Corbin

Off topic, look at the drool on this kid!
It's even blurry because it sways.

Do you want to know what's even awesome-er?  My girls, Bethany and Avery, were visiting last weekend, if you guessed that correctly on Monday!  And, do you want to know what they brought me?
Can you read that?

It says "Milkybones JUST for Corbin, whenever Corbin wants one, no questions asked or tricks needed. No milkeybones for Brutus. Love, Bethany and Avery."
Neener Neener Drooly Boy... no Milkybones for you!


  1. Wow, what a grreat present! I hope Brutus doesn't feel too left out, though.

  2. Bethany and Avery are the sweetest girls! You're so lucky, Corbin!

    When it comes to treats, I love my dad more than my mom too! Sometimes, ladies tend to be stingy and calculating when it is something about TREATS.


  3. Milkbones RULE! We are totally on board with this postie of yours!

    Sam and Pippen

  4. I LOVE Milkbones too! I get one after I play football every morning!

  5. Oh the Milky bones! Tell your momma that momma has the same problem with my pops feeding me XL treats too!!!

  6. So funny, and a totally dad thing to do! I used to do that with Miss M too, and now she only gets little bits of broken up pieces of treats. Though a lot of stores will leave big milkbones outside their shops for the pooches to walk by and have, and she always really wants those and can predict where they will be and she'll lunge for them.

  7. No wonder you gained a little extra stuffing! Golly! - your dad is really, really generous!

    Your mom is just looking out for your health ya know. Oh and who are you kidding? I bet you share some of those milkybones with Brutey. Come on now - any dog that can make their drool sway like that deserves something!

  8. We don't understand why the moms don't understand it is muscle and not fat. We adore milkbones but can't have any wheat. Mom slips us one here and there
    Benny & Lily

  9. Busted Dude - our Mom figured out the same thing - that BIG cookies were not a good idea and now she buys these ones for "little dogs" - really !!!!

  10. Hmmmm...Mom gets us da Mini Milkbones. Now how would you like to get a Milkbone dat isn't even as big as your toenail???

  11. Oh boy, I lurve those Milky Bones!

    Nubbin wiggles,

  12. We have two sizes of milky bones, big for shadow and small for me and Bites. Mom gives us one each evening, dad will sneak us more when mom is occupied. Being the cute handsome dude you do need to share.

    Your Furends
    Susie & Bites

  13. Man - a whole box of Milkbones just for you?! Brutus must be sooooooo jealous!

  14. We feel your pain, Corbin. Dad tries to sneak us milkbones when Mom isn't around, but she rations them like they were rare finds. Except for Phantom, who seems to be able to have as many as he wants and whenever he wants.

    Woos - Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

  15. OMD! That could be MY house!! Why are Mommies soooo mean?! Ma ALWAYS scolds Grandpa about givin' me WAY too may treats. (BTW: That's how I gained all my weight, too.) I can pretty much scam Grandpa out of as many treats as I want (since he watches me durin the day), then meanie Ma gives me hardly any treaties! You know what else she gives me instead of treats? KIBBLE! Can you believe it?? Kibble, instead of treaties! I don't know what's wrong with that woman.
    Anyhu, kudos on the weight Corbin! You look mighty fine!

  16. YEP... the same sorta thingy happened on my hill. And it was DAD and I (and Ernie) that got busted. These Wimmen are just MEAN and STINGY. Us Fellas gotta BAND TOGETHER and get a stop put to this.. horror. I mean just look at that pitiful face full of drool.. STARVING causes that, you know.

  17. A whole box of MilkyBones just for you, Corbin! Bethany and Avery rock!

    Love ya lots,
    Mitch and Molly

  18. Ooooo Corbin...those girls definitely love you. We HOPE your mum can read. We have these little 'woofbix' treats that are about 1/87th the size of your LITTLE milkbone AND SHE rips them in HALF!!! We think Frankie might have a good idea.

    Anyway, there's more for the girls to love, dude.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  19. Corbin you can never have to many milkybones.


  20. C'mon.... you can share one or two of them, right?
    Kisses and hugs

  21. Just tell your mama that more of Corbin means more of him to love!

  22. Aww, poor Brutus looks so sad... can you just share one little one? Maybe a broken one?

  23. Hmmm, gotta get me some milkybones i fink my chum. *snootles off to the shops*

  24. always makes me smile from ear to ear.
    Seriously, what da hell is up withs da treat dispensin'? We gets one little bity treat a day and dats all. And then my dad goes around tellin' mum her is starvin' us...then her rolls her eyes at him.


  25. Your people sound like my people!


  26. Now Now, you must share with the drooly kid. Mom loove that crap, when you are all nice to kids and stuff. Might even get extra treats. Dads are so cool! Mine gave me a piece of bread, some ham and a peanut before Mom even found out.


  27. Drooly boy hee hee

    Stop on by for a visit

  28. Corbin, I hate to say it, but I think mom might be right. Those milky bones are too big to be all chowing down 87 times a day.

    My momma is like yours, though, she can make a cookie last about 87 days. Just doles out little crumbs. As if. I make sure Master always gives us full sized cookies from the jar. Then you know what? Momma totally bought like miniature cookies for the cookie jar. What the heck? It's a conspiracy.


  29. Those treats are MIN-IS-CULE! I mean it's not enough to make even one taste bud happy-ful.

    You need to take your momma in paw and fix her little red wagon.

    Shelle, Milo, Dixie & Newby

  30. Enjoy your milkybones. Pace yourself. You don't want to run out of the yummy goodenss.


  31. I luvs them too.. Sometimes I go out to pee and just go dribble dribble and runs back in to look at the cookie jar. I loves them so much.

    woof - Tucker

  32. WOW--that is a really big milk bone. Desmond would FREAK. So much drool. We give him the ones for small dogs. He gets two a day, at least--one from each of us as we leave for work in the AM, and sometimes we use them to get him back in from the yard, too. :-)